It’s about ‘Us & Ours’

April 29, 2010 at 3:31 pm 5 comments

I am not a homemaker yet but like any other girl the idea of making one fascinates me. This post is result of a recent discussion with a friend who faced some glitches while planning hers. She is past those blocks and since it was a discussion that sorted it out. I am sharing some of the outcomes that helped!

 

Varsha was having her usual early morning chat session with Neeraj. She called it  ‘T3- their time together’, they discussed everything from dreams, things to do list, plans and goals and everything about life. He was always keen to know all the ideas & desires Varsha nurtured. Well, it was during one of those conversations where she was telling him about shopping for sprucing up their home. A careful spender but high on expressing the way she wants to do things worried Neeraj. In the gentlest manner he reasoned it out with her and said while doing up the house is great idea but spending on things which will just occupy space and have little or no use is to be strictly avoided.

But when did I talk about just buying things for the heck of it, Varsha tried to reason but Neeraj was adamant, “we will not pick-up things that have no value- add in our home.”

Both are correct and clear on what and how they want to do things together. What probably is amiss is a common ground for them to stand on.

While Varsha called it quits on this subject and went about with her daily routine at office and Neeraj too didn’t pick-up the conversation again, his policy on such issues is clear ‘sleep over the matter’. Clearly not a solution for those who are planning to come together to make a life;

 

To do- when faced with a situation like this;

 

  • The idea all along is to share what we want and may not necessarily mean get it too (Subject to requirement).  Both need to remember that most of the ‘make a home’ purchases are planned for and done in an order of priority!

 

  • Selecting things to do up a home should be considered as bonding exercises and not a chore that will add to the stress levels. Neeraj on his part marked out the budget and Varsha on her side decided to focus on things they need and splurge on, only a few things of less utility and more show. There has to be balance.

 

  • Two people from different backgrounds when together need to create a space comfortable for both. If she likes style and he simplicity then everything should be done in a fashion that is an amalgamation of both! And who says style is all about show off? Understated elegance is the cue here!

 

  • Don’t cross out or point at everything she picks, trust her choice and you too should consider his advice. End of the day it’s the two who can give home a warm and welcoming feeling to it.

 

  • If living with in-laws, always give them time to come to terms with the change around them. Too much at the same time can be unacceptable. For e.g. new bed spreads will be a good idea but change in furniture may not be. Small steps will give you confidence to take the next.

 

  • Please understand a girl is leaving her secure environ and moving in a relatively unknown space. It’s a big responsibility to make her feel that your home is as much hers.

 

  • You get two guests in a year or four in a month should never decide the requirement of things in a house. Always remember, your home at any point should have means to host guests without compromising on anyone’s privacy.

 

  • At last, love should be abundance, the concept of sharing and understanding should be present. Don’t control all strings but try to see it from other person’s perspective. You can’t make a life in isolation then why create corners.

 

Happy Living and home making!

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Entry filed under: COL- Circle of Life!.

CWG 2010- Are we ready? C-Calling!

5 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Prateek  |  April 29, 2010 at 5:08 pm

    Nice post. Maybe, I will take your advice on home making around 7-8 years from now. 😉

    Reply
    • 2. delhizen  |  May 14, 2010 at 1:36 pm

      Anytime, maybe I should start charging a fee- only in ‘Kind’ of course 😉

      Reply
  • 3. Sapna  |  May 3, 2010 at 11:54 am

    Nice post 🙂

    Reply
    • 4. delhizen  |  May 14, 2010 at 1:37 pm

      Thankew! Sappy.

      New job is keeping you busy, I can see! No time for friends

      Reply
  • 5. ranjith  |  May 5, 2010 at 7:24 pm

    nice post ! am bound to use it when need be 🙂 Liked your attention to detail…

    Reply

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